If tears could make a puddle, I would have been sitting in the mud. Tears mixed with shame, doubt, worry, bitterness, and anger are a big mess. It can be a messy life...right? Sitting on the floor of my kitchen I wondered how to make my way out of what seemed a deep pit. Battling for my life, I lay my face to the ground. The cold tile pressed to my cheek acting as a microphone for my whisper...Jesus do you hear me?
You not only hear...but you keep track of my tears...
psalms 56:8" You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book."
The mind, and its battlefield is a real place, and lots of women are doing war there. Behind the mascara, and our eyes, is a place, the place we women wage the fight for our lives. When I think of depression I think of a heart being battered in the secret places. It is where no one sees the blows to your spirit, and the shame that comes from being beaten down by lost hope. The word depression seems so clinical doesn't it. It feels like a big stamp on the forehead that says, " So you are, and so you will be."
A bottle of pills, and the worlds counsel cannot heal a broken heart. Only the love of the Father can be our healer. He says..." I am the God that healeth thee ( Exodus 15:26). Depression seeks to isolate, and shame you. No one can heal your heart, and that pain, leaves you offended, and feeling rejected. It is a cycle, and like being on a merry go round that you cannot get off of. You feel pushed by your emotions, round, and round you go, and when it will stop you would like to know.
Your thought life, attitude, and the way you manage them is your choice today. You can choose the posture of your heart. The one thing about depression is that it has a common theme, and it is a feeling of no choice, and helplessness. I am hear today to tell you that you have a choice to choose what thoughts you will allow to stay, and the ones you send packing. You no longer have to feel like a puppet on the end of the strings of your emotions.
Although there are things in your life that you have no control over; I say to you, it is your choice to trust God with them. You cannot fix others, or be positive that everything will turn out just as you have planned. Thats what we want as women isn't it...to be secure...to be able to trust? You can trust in God, and He is the God, that says that as we commit our plans to Him we will find success. (Proverbs 16:5)
Depression is not your identity, or your future.
Philipians 4: 6-7 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
If you are struggling with your thought life today...I pray that in all things you will know, that you can put your trust in God. All anxieties that you may be facing today have to bow in His presence. Anxiety and depression do not have rule over you, but peace will guard your mind, and your heart today. As you choose to refocus your thoughts today, I ask the Father to give you a deep peace that goes beyond all human understanding.
so you are...HIS, and you are LOVED <3
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